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Funny Answers to Jackbox Tv Questions

Written By Thursday, June 30, 2022 Add Comment Edit

And right this way, please.

In General: 1995-2003

  • The generic wrong answer responses rarely come up, but they tend to be hilarious:

    Here's a little spending money! (Ching)

    Special Delivery! Have some bad news for you!

    You're wrong, and stay out of my purse!

    All positions are filled, but thank you for applying!

    "L" is for Loser!

    U-G-L-Y! You ain't got no alibi! You ugly!

    "Can I help you with anything?" "Oh, no thank you, I'm just losing."

    Old Man: What the dealio?

    I got confuuuused... buh.

    Sing-song voice: That's not iiiit!

    Whiny voice: Hey, mom, can I have some money for lunch? note Made even funnier considering that the question values range from $1,000-$3,000 in Round 1 and from $2,000-$6,000 in Round 2.

    Tour Guide: And if you look to your left; you'll see the popular wrong answer! (Crowd reacts in awe)

    Deep voice: I'm afraid we'll have to garnish your wages.

    Tough Guy: I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT!

    (whip cracks) Uhh! (another whip crack) Ooh, that's nice...

    Rich Woman: "Please, anything but the china!" (crash) "Damn you to Hell!"

    (Bullet Ricochets)

    (Chainsaw motor with an accompanying Stock Scream)

    (Plane Crash)

    "Whoa, whoa!" (Crashing noises)

    "It's only fun until someone loses an eye." (boink) "Oh, my eye!" (boinkboinkboink...)

    Nate: In a word: No.

    Nate: Uhh, yes, I'd like to direct your attention to your score; watch closely...

    Nate: Great job! *Beat* Oh! Oh, that was the one you picked! Sorry...

    (Swing) Nate: Ooh!...Sliced it.

    Nate: Spicy!

    Nate: Look straight ahead and say, "buh-bye!"

    Nate: NO, not that one!

    Nate, faking sympathy: Aw, I-I'm sorry, that's incorrect, b-but it was a really bad guess!

    Nate: This might sting a little. *WHAP!

    Guy: Well, you're wrong... but at least you're not attractive.

    Guy: Y'know, there's one thing I've learned about defeat. IT SUCKS!

    Guy: SUH-WINNNNG, BATTAH!

    Guy: You know, "loser" is such a strong word...

    Guy, dopily: R-O-N-G...wrong!

    Buzz: Hi there, I'd like you to meet Negative Score. Negative Score: Hi there! (nervous laughter) Hi!

    Buzz, sped up: BUSTED!

    Buzz, in a fake Russian accent: As ve say in Russia, nyet.

    (cracking sounds) Cookie: Uh, that's extremely painful!!

    Cookie: (Laughs) That's a good one.

    Cookie: Oh, that's not good.

    Cookie: Interesting, uhh...choice.

    Cookie: Let this be a lesson to you.

    Cookie: Lean in real close to the screen and kiss your cash goodbye.

    Cookie: Uhh...what the hell were you thinkin' there?

    Cookie, sadly: It's just tragic.

    Cookie: What?? No.

    Schmitty: You got it! Oh, no you don't, I'm just messing with you.

    Schmitty: Hope you didn't spend that money already.

    Schmitty: Whoa, you are waaaaay outta line!

    Schmitty: You're wrong, and you smell like ass.

    Schmitty, in his newsreader voice: Tonight: wrong answers and the players that love them!

    Schmitty: Have you considered a career in marketing?

    Schmitty: That's...not it!

  • The commercial for Brannigar and The Hawk, a buddy cop movie starring a loose cannon cop portrayed by Sylvester Stallone and his equally loose cannon partner portrayed by Stephen Hawking.
  • The opening sequences for Volume 2 are pretty damn funny. For example, if you opt for a single player game:
    • Raul does the same thing in Movies.

      Raul: Oh, so you're playing with yourself. Hey, no jokes from me. So why don't you go ahead and type in your name, Lefty?

    • The computerized sign-in voice of Mock 2 also pulls this one off, but with a completely straight face.

      Voice: One person playing with himself. Fine.

  • All of the Impossible Questions in Volume 3 live up to their name, with the exception of one - its category is "It's a Dog!" and the question is "What has four legs, a tail, and barks?" Guess what the answer is. Yep, a dog.

    Cookie: Don't you wish your SATs were this easy?

  • In Movies, if your final score is crap:

    Cookie: Player, your performance is like starring in a really bad movie: You get to be the star and all, but nobody gives a s**t.

  • A question from Volume 2 asks for the correct pronunciation of the singer of "Smooth Operator." It's shar-day (close enough). The next question (all category choices lead to the same one) is about the Marquis de Sade, leading to the host's comment, "I think he went nuts because everyone kept calling him the Marquis de Shar-day."
  • The hosts will most certainly let you hear it if you don't buzz in during a single-player Jack Attack:
    • Television: "'Oh, I don't wanna hit the buttons by myself, what if I get one wrong?!' YOU LOSER!"
    • Movies: "You lame-ass, who did you think was going to see it, you're playing by yourself!"
    • 3: "Your momma's not here to push the buttons for you, you lame-ass!"
    • 1: "HEY! You chickenshit, you didn't even TRY!"
    • The Ride, considering you're playing alone and have finished the game with a positive score:

      Cookie: What the hell?! Did you go to the BATHROOM? It's supposed to be INTERACTIVE, remember?!

      Guy: Hey, what the hell happened?! You fall asleep? Look, no guts, no glory, my friend.

      Schmitty: Hey, what the hell's going on? Did you blackout on me? Or did you start to have a conversation with your imaginary friends?

      Nate: Hey, you're supposed to have your finger on your buzzer, not up your butt! No guts - no bucks!

    • 5th Dementia: "Oh come on, you wuss, you're playing by yourself! What, do you think I'm gonna tell everyone how much you suck?!"
  • The following messages have been brought to you by The United States Department for Condesending Paternalism:
    • "Antifreeze. Don't drink it." "Why?" "'Cause it'll kill you." "Oh."
    • "Ice. Watch out." "Why?" "Slippery." "Oh."
    • "Liquor. Don't drink that." "Why?" "Mine." "Oh."
    • "Loose women. Don't date them." "Why?" "They're not the marrying kind." "Oh."
  • Typing "fuck you" into the Gibberish Question round always yields funny results.
    • The usual pattern is this:
      • Once: Deduct some money and a potential name change
      • Twice: No deduction of money but the host calls your response unoriginal and makes fun of you.
      • Thrice: Quit to desktop, usually with a quip about how you can't do anything about it.
    • By far the funniest is the beat followed by the bizarrely high-pitched "W-WHAT?!" that Cookie lets out upon the player doing this in ''Movies''. So funny you can almost HEAR the jaws dropping in the studio...
    • The Old Man's response to seeing the player's answer? "Call the air force!"
    • The best one is in Head Rush and involves a skit between the host, Abraham Lincoln, and a goat.
    • On Vol. 1:

    Nate: Are you talking to me? On my show? I don't think so! Why don't you take a good look at your score, huh? Fuck me? No, fuck you! (takes off $50,000) No, no, no, no, no. (snickers) I didn't say "fuck you". I said, "FUCK! YOU!" (takes off an additional $100,000)

    • And even in the censored version:

    Nate: ...and next time, maybe you'll think twice before you flip me off. (takes off $50,000) You know, I thought that'll make me feel better, but I'm still pissed off. I don't think that punishment was adequate. (takes off an additional $100,000)

    • And if all the players type in "fuck you", the game quits to the desktop (the Steam library for the re-releases).
    • A playlist
    • Even in some versions without Gibberish Questions, the related running gag returns when typing in your name.
      • If you do this in the Ride, the game ends before it's even begun.

      Sign Up Lady: What an aggressive thing to say! I think you need a time out. When you think you can come back and behave like an adult, let me know. Okay? Goodbye.

    • Gibberish Questions returned in Full Stream, which means the return of the running gag. Due to the different gameplay mechanics, when any player submits "fuck you" as an answer, Cookie gives a fed-up monologue about how long he's been doing the same thing, and shows a sarcastic, even more exasperated essay about the history of the running gag on your phone.

    Cookie: Look, I've been doing this for twenty years, so if you—

    Cookie, to himself: Wait, no, that can't be right. Twenty years... I still look so young in my headshot.

    Cookie: [Beat] ...Anyway, if you want an easter egg so bad, look at your device. Now, back to the game.

  • Some of the Couch Gags in The Lost Gold:

    Loading, Loading, Loading...
    ...keep those .dat files loading, RAWHIDE!

    Who's ready for some trivia?
    WE SAID WHO'S READY FOR SOME TRIVIA?!

    Been waiting for a long time for this game?
    Here you go—now enough with the whining.

    If High Culture and Pop Culture collide and no one's there to see it...
    ...does it make a fart sound effect?

    Just when you thought the trivia depths have been plumbed...
    ...we fished out a few floaters.

    If you've made it this far...
    ...then our programmers really DO know what they're doing!

    If you liked JACK Germany volume 4...
    ...you're gonna LOVE this game!

    Thought you never see another JACK game huh?
    Well.. you were half right.

    What do you think of this font?
    Does it make our "B" look fat?

    This space for rent...
    ...contact sales @Jellyvision.com!

    This is a message to www.ydkjforum.cjb.net...
    ...here's your game—now leave us alone!

    There's no "i" in "team"...
    ...and there's no "i" in "cyclops" either. Interesting.

  • The commercial for the "Philosopher World" theme park, especially this part:
  • Sports has a question about ancient Minoan sports. Answer "Camel roping" and you get this gem:

    Guy Towers: "No, but the ancient Egyptians enjoyed camel roping. They did it on Wednesdays, and that's where the term 'Hump Day' comes from. (Beat) And, what you've just heard is a total lie."

  • In YDKJ Movies: "Question 18: Honor student by day... STRIPPER by night!"
  • This soap opera scene, heard in the background and featured on You Don't Hear Jack:

    Old Man: Your temper's just like your mother!
    Schmitty: My temp- what?!
    Old Man: I- Ohhh...
    Schmitty: How do you- you don't know anything about my mother.
    Old Man: No, I didn't.
    Schmitty: Did you know-? What are you trying to say?
    Old Man: Okay, I knew your mother!
    Schmitty: Wha- HOW DID YOU KNOW MY MOTHER?
    Old Man: I knew your mother...
    Schmitty: What are you saying?
    Old Man: ...in France... I don't know, I had too much to drink.
    Schmitty: What are you trying-
    Old Man: No, I loved her for many hours!
    Schmitty: Ugh.
    Old Man: And she, had you, out of a wedlock.
    Schmitty: Old Man, are you trying to tell me that-
    Old Man: Schmitty!
    Schmitty: You're trying to tell me that you are my, my...
    Old Man: SAY IT!
    Schmitty: ...Daddy?

    • This is actually the "Fuck You" Easter Egg response after the third player flips Schmitty off and then presses any key.
  • The "question 2" intro from Movies: "Cut the red wire. WATCH OUT, IT'S GONNA BLOW! (bomb timer stops at 2) "That was close." "Two close."
  • The BH 1 "Behind the Song" ads from 5th Dementia, which describe the strange origins behind Black Sabbath's "Iron Man" and Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Freebird."
  • The commercial for American Council on Booze Consumption(ment). Appropriately, the announcer slurs the organization name.
  • The Brazen Paper Towels commercial, featuring a rude mascot.

    Mom: How good is Brazen?
    Brazen Paper Towel Man: "How good is Brazen"?! Shut your trap and I'll tell ya!
    Boy: Hey, you can't talk to my mom like that!
    Brazen Paper Towel Man: Shut up, punk, or I'll smack you in the back of the head with my class ring!

  • One of the category names in Television is "Tootie". If the category is chosen, Schmitty will first mock you for choosing the category and expecting him to get upset, before delivering the question: which character from a classic TV show also has the nickname "Tootie"? The correct answer is Gunther Toody. Cue Schmitty saying that from this point forward, Gunther Toody will also never be the right answer.
    • The question following this one (all categories lead to the same question) includes "Joe E. Ross", Gunther Toody's actor, as a possible answer. Choose it and Schmitty will angrily remind you that, as established in the last question, Gunther Toody is never the right answer.
  • One question in Television asks what you would be doing if instead of playing the theme song to The Flintstones on a kazoo, you played it on a "Gazoo". One of the possible answers is "tooting on Wilma's hair bone"; if it's chosen, Schmitty will launch into yet another tirade about Tootie never being the right answer before realizing it wasn't even in the answer. He still deducts cash, though.
  • Almost all of the Pissed About A Question questions from Netshow can count, but probably the funniest is one discussing a potential convention for fans of the Netshow, where everyone who attends can have sex. Bonus points for the question not coming from someone who's upset, but from a legitimate fan of the game.
  • From Volume 2, "Pope Rock" is one of the categories that can induce a Celebrity Collect Call. However, if the category is chosen, the crew won't be able to successfully call the Pope, instead receiving an automated voicemail message - which means no celebrity question at the start of the second half of the game.
  • The question intros in the first Netshow volume take a noticeably different approach from the other volumes; instead of having songs for each number, they're either accompanied by music / sound effects that fit the question animation or are accompanied by a quote with the number shouted by the audience thrown in there. The latter doesn't quite work out sometimes.

    Announcer: Lordy, Lordy, look who's forty -
    Audience: TWENTY!
    Announcer: ... th-that doesn't rhyme.

UK Version

  • Insulting responses to wrong answers included; "You're not really university material, are you", "Do you do manual labour, perchance?" and "You're talking BULLSHIT!!"

Vol. 4: The Ride

  • The often-cynical responses to whatever you pick from the Moral Dilemma at the start of every The Ride game. One such example: "If you looked outside and saw someone doing a highwire act on your telephone line, what would you do?"
    • If you select "Tell him how important your phone line is":

    "God forbid you should go without blabbing to your friends for one day.
    Be sure to tell them what a killjoy you are."

    • And if you select "applaud and scream in delight":

    "You must love the circus!
    Nothing beats eating cotton candy

    and watching abused animals perform."

  • The Parody Commercial for "Sunshine Suppositories". Starting with a man named Johnson getting chewed out by a boss, things quickly get derailed when the boss says, "I'm not here to blow sunshine up your ass!" followed by a cheery, "But I am!" Mickey Mousing to indicate an Ass Shove or two later, and, well, smiles all around. And then, the tagline: "Spread your cheeks for a little sunshine today!"
  • The second episode, regardless of the theme you've picked, has Cookie crashing the game from Buzz, the intended host and dropping him down a trap door only to get chewed out by Helen for doing so.
    • At one point, Buzz finally gets back to the "surface", swearing revenge on Cookie... Until Guy Towers comes into the booth and serves the said revenge on both of 'em, by sending them to The Bottom.

    Buzz: (panting heavily) Thought you'd seen the last of me, huh? Well, you can't get rid of me that—(trapdoor opening)—AAAAAAAAAAH!

    Guy: Nice one.

    Cookie: Thanks—Guy? How did you get up here?

    Cookie: Oh, did I say he was there? I was—

    Guy: Hey, it's fine. Heh. Look at Buzz go.

    Cookie: Yeah.

    Guy: No, no—you have to look real close.

    Cookie: Uh, I don't think—

    Guy: It's okay, I'll hold on to your belt.

    Cookie: I'm...not wearing a belt—(thump)—AAAAAAAAAAH!

  • Floor 112: Language is sponsored by Ye Olde Booze Shoppe, which leaves some samples behind. Over the course of the game Cookie gets drunker, and drunker, until the 12th question: "Which of these slang terms for "regurgitation" is NOT a good example of "onomatopoeia?" The four available choices are "barf", "hurl", "ralph", and "upchuck", but while you have to choose one, Cookie does all of the above... literally, yes.
    • And when you get it right:

    Cookie: Urgh...yeah. Upchuck is...that's not the sound that makes.

  • Finish Floor 120: Dairy, and you get treated to a hilarious smooth jazz love song filled with dairy puns. Let's Player Suraht found it painful to sit through.

2011

  • The sponsors for the Wrong Answer of the Game, including:

    Rug Munchers Edible Flooring! We put a whole new spin on the 5 second rule.
    BloodCo! All your blood needs, without the mess or fuss. Any type, any thickness, any gender! BloodCo!
    The Insincere Greeting Card Factory! Because you totally deserve the very best!
    Fistable Bowling Equipment Inc! Bury yourself in your ball, right up to your wrist. Fistable Bowling Equipment!
    Fashion Barrel Barrel Wear! Comfort, freedom, style, and the faint smell of pickles. Wear your wood well.
    Romanticlip Tandem Toenail Clippers! Because the couple that clips toe-gether, stays toe-gether!
    Felt-Up Hand Puppet Lube! Now with a tingling sensation to let you know it's working!
    Fat-Mouth Fascist Fish! The animatronic fish toy that's sweeping the nation! He sings, he moves, he hates democracy! Fat-Mouth Fascist Fish!
    Doomsday Devices, Ltd.! Forget the black market! Buy your doomsday device from a federally regulated, limited-liability company!

  • All of Cookie's dreams from Nocturnal Admissions.
  • Episode 2, Question 6ix asks, "Which of the following is not a Crayola crayon color eating another crayon color?" Among the choices is "a beaver eating macaroni and cheese." Picking it will cause Cookie to thank you for giving him an excuse to talk about the image of a beaver eating macaroni and cheese, and take a moment for him to think about it. After the question is over, no matter how you answered, Cookie will continue talking about that choice.

    Cookie: Some other actual Crayola colors I could have used: a timber wolf eating asparagus, a pink flamingo eating cotton candy, and a beaver eating macaroni and cheese - wait, did I already mention that? I guess I did, oh well, I just wanted to be sure I mentioned a beaver eating macaroni and cheese. Well, let's beaver-eating-macaroni-and-cheese on to the next question.

  • Episode 25 revolves around Cookie sending out e-vites for his party to members of the staff. Literally each and every one of them turn him down, giving him ridiculous excuses (such as Donny getting a hysterectomy and two members of the staff getting two-for-one lobotomies), and it culminates in Question 10n, where an angry Cookie asks the player which excuse he heard makes any medical sense, with Cookie not only peppering in more insults towards those who made the excuses in the first place in addition to pointing out why they're wrong, but calling everyone out even on the right answer.

    Cookie: An otolaryngologist is an ear, nose and throat doctor. All the rest of you are f**king bad liars.

    • One of the answers in Question 10n is delivered by the pirate from ''The Lost Gold''.
  • In Episode 37, at the end of the Dis or Dat, Cookie laments that Beef O'Brady's doesn't sponsor the St. Petersburg bowl, because he sure likes saying "Beef O'Brady's". Cue Question 5ive, which has the title "Beef O'Brady's!". Bonus points for said question having absolutely nothing to do with Beef O'Brady's.
    • In the same episode, the Wrong Answer of the Game sponsor is the "It's Never Too Late Adult Orphanage", and getting it shows you a picture of the middle-aged orphan you've won. Fast forward all the way to Question 10n, where instead of the "baby" being the letter n, it's that same picture from the WAotG.
  • In Episode 47, the writers go on a picnic before finishing all the questions. The first six questions are normal, but they become more mangled as the remaining people rush to complete questions for the episode; Question 7even ends up having two of the same answer ("Hmm, that's weird"), Question 8ight was written by Donny, Question 9ine is interrupted by staffer Kim, who made a mistake, Question 10n was made up by Cookie off of a Snapple cap, and in the Jack Attack round (written by Chad, and which Cookie tries to stop until his mic gets cut off), all you have to do for a match is pick whatever the phrase tells you to pick.
    • In Donny's question there's not only Cookie's reactions to it, but also the responses you get when you answer wrong.

    Cookie: "Oh, please, don't be so knave." Yeah. Right. Right, Donny! We wouldn't want anyone to be knave, would we?!

    • What makes the Jack Attack especially funny is that, once Cookie realizes exactly what Chad has unleashed, him pleading to Helen to shut it down actually starts bleeding into the Jack Attack itself until his audio's finally cut off.
  • Question 10n of episode 50 gives us a rather amusing Wrong Answer of the Game fake out if "450 minutes of your life" is chosen.

    Cookie: Nope, the highest possible credit score is not 900. But you know what IS 900? The Wrong Answer of the Game, brought to you by - psych! Nah, you didn't find the Wrong Answer of the Game! Better luck next Wrong Answer!

  • Episode 69 is much more... mature than normal, for obvious reasons. This ends up with the intro to question 9ine, where the video slows down at a point where the left 9 is upside down (like a 6) and the right 9 is normal.
  • Question 8ight of episode 5 from JACK PACK 1 opens with Cookie dedicating the question to his old high school chemistry teacher. Then he starts the question off with "Suppose a chemistry teacher died a painful and horrible death and went to Hell..."
  • Question 6ix of episode 3 from JACK PACK 4 features the winner of a contest appearing on the show and delivering a question ("which planet from the Star Wars universe would be the most appropriate site for the Interplanetary Winter Olympics?"), much to the annoyance of Cookie. Then it turns out that said question also contains the Wrong Answer of the Game (Tatooine)...

    Contest Winner: The dual moons of Tatooine remind me of -

    Cookie: NOTHING! They don't remind you of anything! But they remind ME of tattoos!

    Contest Winner: Tat-what? That - that's ridiculous.

    Cookie: Like the tattoos you'll be putting all over your body with your new U-Tattoo Do-it-Yourself Tattoo Kit!

    Contest Winner: Th-this has nothing to do with -

    Cookie: Shut up!

  • The Couch Gags from the two episodes of the demo are hilarious.
    • Snow Globe Surplus Store:

    Cookie: So you want to play a free game huh? CUE THE TIGHTWAD EPISODE!

    • Bowl-Bee Bowl:
  • Also from a demo episode (Snow Globe Surplus Store) and question, one of the questions is which Looney Tunes character could not pose for the Chinese zodiac. The answer is Daffy Duck. Cookie's response after that...

    Cookie: Nope, no duck on the Chinese calendar, just on a Chinese menu! (quack)

  • The "Fuck You" reactions make a reappearance at the sign-up:

    Donny: OH, MY VERGING EYES! That's not a name one gets from one's mother, that is a name one fishes out of a gas station toilet!

2015 (From Jackbox Party Pack 1)

  • The return of the Wrong Answer of the Game sponsors. In this game, the announcer is clearly far more annoyed with what he has to read. Hilarity ensues.

    Kale Mart! If you find a single thing in our store that is not associated with kale, it's free! Kale Mart! We don't even know what kale is, and we don't care!

    Oopsie Daddy Male Pregnancy Tests! When you need to know quick whether you're going to be a daddy or not, trust Oopsie Daddy! Just pee, and wait!

    Is It a Dog? Just answer "yes" or "no" to the various photos, based on whether or not you think it's a dog or not! Then you'll win the game! How fun is that? Very!

    The Devil! Sure, God and Heaven sound great and everything, but have you fully considered Hell? Or are you just going by what you've heard?

    Accordion to Jim Accordion Store! Your one-stop shop for all your accordion needs! Well, needs is probably a strong word, desires - yes, accordion desires! No, that's probably too strong too, look, if you have or want an accordion, just come here!

    Hats for Rats! What, they're good enough for medical testing but not good enough for a hat?! Let them have a hat, for God's sake! It's all they've got!

  • Once again, the "Fuck You" prompt has returned upon signup. Every single time, it always gets changed into a random name before the game begins. The first time, Cookie expresses his annoyance and takes $1000 from the get-go. Do it a second time, he deducts $50000, then docks one more dollar because $50000 just wouldn't cut it. The third time? Cookie just gives up and doesn't even bother starting the game, instead giving you a goat which keeps bleating until you press the "Leave Game" prompt.

    Cookie: Okay, look, I'm— I'm not just gonna be repeatedly told to f*** myself, so, tell you what I'm gonna do: you're getting a goat. Yeah, that's it, game over, here's a goat​, enjoy.

  • Episode 8 is basically to YDKJ 2015 what Episode 47 was to 2011. The show opens with Cookie announcing that the episode will be guest-starring Paul Rudd. He doesn't show up for the first question... or throughout the rest of the show, throughout which both Billy O'Brien and Old Man troll Cookie (the latter comes back in true Brick Joke style in "Foggy Facts with Old Man", which basically boils down to "During which question did I troll Cookie?"), Cookie gets increasingly annoyed with each passing question that Paul Rudd doesn't show up (going so far as to replace the Paul Rudd-themed Dis or Dat with people who "showed up where they were expected" and "didn't show up at all"), and almost every single question involves Paul Rudd in some way. This culminates in the Jack Attack, "Just Don't Pick Paul Rudd", where the clues are extremely obvious and all of the wrong answers are "Paul Rudd". The final prompt of said Jack Attack is "totally heartbroken", with the answer being Cookie Masterson, of course. Then the end reveals that Paul Rudd was never supposed to be there to begin with; Cookie was only deluding himself that Paul Rudd was going to be on the show.
    • It's made twice as funny once you realize that this episode was likely intended to be a Spiritual Successor to the infamous "Lawn Wax" episode, due to one of the dummy answers for the latter's Jack Attack actually being "Paul Rudd".
  • The prize for the Wrong Answer of the Game in Episode 13 is a gift basket crafted by the Devil. Included in the basket is a copy of Volume 2. Makes sense, considering how poorly Buzz has been treated since his first and only appearance as host.
  • Episode 14 has Cookie arguing with his cats who claim that he steals office supplies.

    Cookie: THEY WERE COMPLIMENTARY, DAMMIT!

  • Question 7even of Episode 23 gives us Betty O'Brien taking a rhetorical question out of proportion.

    Betty: I suttose you want ne to leave now...

    Cookie: Does a bear shit in the woods?

    Betty: Yes, yes it does. I saw a dear shit in the woods when I was a little satling. It was horridle! The shit strays everywhere, and it gets stuck in their fur! Oh, and the snell, it snells like -

    Cookie: The fuck is wrong with you, it was a rhetorical question! Get out!

  • There's a new animation for 6ix: it's a silent movie, where 3 (complete with evil moustache) leaves 6 tied up on the railroad tracks, whereupon another 6 shows up to help. Sometimes it gets off in time (causing the 6 in 6ix to still have rope on it), and other times it doesn't, (causing 6ix to become ix) when the second 6 is astounded that this is happening again.

Full Stream (From Jackbox Party Pack 5)

  • At the end of the reveal video:

    Binjpipe Voice: What if a trivia game lived inside a fictional streaming service that lived inside a pack of five party games?

    Cookie: THEY GET IT ALREADY!

  • At the end of the official trailer:

    Binjpipe Voice: That's You Don't Know Jack: Full Stream, one of five games in The Jackbox Party Pack 5, only on Binjpipe!

    Cookie: Yeah, well, the "Binjpipe" part is a joke.

    Binjpipe Voice: Or is it?

    Cookie: It is.

    Binjpipe Voice: ...But is it?

    Cookie: YES!

  • The question 4 intro shows a number 4 as a rebellious teenager (complete with piercings and a tattoo), looking at its phone. The caption: "the question that doesn't care."
    • There's also a variant where another 4 wearing a "#1 Stepdad" hops in and the caption "the question that needs some space, Brian."
  • "6 trombones is not a parade!"
  • This time, if you give "Fuck You" in the Gibberish Question, Cookie doesn't take away any extra money and just gives your device an Easter egg, saying he's been doing this for about 20 years (and mutters that he still looks young in his headshot) along with a link at the bottom to The Congratulations Chicken.
    • This is just one of many responses from Cookie. Clearly the writing staff finds the joke funnier than Cookie does.
  • A crazy three-part Brick Joke, first seen during a preview playing about three weeks before the release:
    • The category "I Never Knew How To Pronounce French Names" note Question 6 has the possible answers being just the word "Louis" a number of times.
    • Then the category "I Never Forget A French Name" note Question 9, following a regular question and a Gibberish Question asks how many times Cookie said "Louis" in the above question. At the end, Cookie says to wait until he asks how many times he's said "Louis" in this game.
    • It's followed by the category "How Many Times Have I Said 'Louis' In This Game So Far?" The actual question has the D choice being "Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis" If you pick the D Choice as the answer then Cookie will get annoyed.

    Cookie: Stop making me say: "Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis Louis" Stop that!

  • Many of the Players' Choice decisions:
    • A delicate question about musicals OR A musical question about delicates? If the latter is chosen, the question starts with a intro like a Broadway musical.
    • A question where the answer is Shia LaBeouf OR A question where the answer is NOT Shia LaBeouf? If the former is chosen, all the possible choices are "Shia LaBeouf".
    • A question where everything is spelled correctly OR A question where everything is spelled incorrectly? Depending on what's chosen, either the word "everything" or every other word in the question will be spelled correctly.
    • A forward question OR A backward question? If the latter is chosen, the question is choice D and Cookie calls out anyone who chooses it.
    • A question with nothing to hide OR A question with an ulterior motive? If the former is chosen, Cookie just gives the answer.
  • One episode has Jimmy Fallon guest-hosting a question. The problem is that, after his question is done, he won't leave the studio, forcing Cookie to share the rest of the game with him in what barely falls short of a Hostile Show Takeover. By the time the Jack Attack rolls around, he just gives up and lets Jimmy run the thing.
    • The funniest part, though, is how after he finally leaves at the end of the game, he immediately proceeds to invade Schmitty's radio show during the credits.
  • If the game somehow ends in an exact 8-way tie, Cookie will acknowledge the fact that happened, and lampshade the fact you almost certainly manipulated the game to make it happen:

    Cookie: Oh, come on! An 8 way tie? Oh, the odds are pretty much against that. Much better odds you somehow manipulated the game to find out if this scenario would trigger the custom audio file you're hearing right now. Is it everything you hoped for? Anyway, since you know the game so well, here's the part where you hear the slam and the words "You Don't Know Jack". Wait for it. (Beat) Should be any time now.

The TV Show

  • Once an episode, there was a "2,000,000 question", which would start at two million dollars and slowly decrease until someone answered it. What would happen next is something would happen to constantly distract the host until most of the value of the question had been lost, usually only being a couple hundred dollars. Examples of what happened include:
    • Reubens sneezing and sending the card flying across the stage, and constantly grasping at the card only for it to keep flopping around.
    • Reubens being interrupted by his dog coming in and trying to take the card away.
    • Answering a cell phone call
    • His hand getting caught in the conveyor belt.
    • Getting attacked by ninjas.

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Source: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/YouDontKnowJack

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